Monday, May 18, 2015

Medical Student Mommy/Sister Guilt

So I just realized I forgot to put up a post last week, but honestly I was so busy with studying that it wouldn’t have been much anyway. Today I took my fourth neuro block exam, which means that I only have one more to go until freedom! I also have one last primary care skills exam along with an OMM practical and final exam to take, but I’m not too worried about those. I’m just so ready to have a break from all this studying!

Last week was a bit rough for me because I had to make the decision to cancel my trip to Louisiana to attend my little sister’s college graduation that was this past Friday. With today’s exam and random in-class quizzes, it was just too much of a risk to take that much time away from school. I also would have had to drive since it’s more expensive to fly with my daughter, and I’m just not the type of person who can listen to lectures while driving. Luckily, my family pretty much understands the crazy demands of medical school, and my sister insisted that I stay home and study. It was just hard for me to deal with because her college graduation was something that I looked forward to for a very long time.

Unfortunately, this will not be the only big event that I miss in the coming years, but the path I’ve chosen requires a lot of sacrifices to be made.  I knew what I was signing up for when I made the decision to pursue becoming a physician, and I am so blessed to have people in my life who not only understand, but are supportive of my endeavors. I guess the only thing that I really worry about is my daughter’s well-being and how she will deal with everything over the coming years. Right now, she deals with my constant studying and lack of availability quite well, and I am forever grateful for it. She knows I can’t be the parent attending all the field trips or baking cookies for the class, and she is okay with that. I hope she stays this way, but you never know. The only thing I can really guarantee is that I will always be there when it counts. I can also guarantee that she will continue to be raised with love and be provided with everything she needs in life. I know that what I am doing will benefit not only the both of us, but many people to come, so I will continue to put in the hard work and do what I need to do to succeed. Plus, to see me succeed will let my daughter know that she is capable of achieving anything in life as long as she is willing to work hard for it. I guess right now I’m just having feelings of mommy/sister guilt, but blogging has taught me that I’m probably not the only one going through it, so I decided to share. Moral of the story? Don’t be afraid to make the necessary sacrifices to get to where you need and want to be in life. The picture above says it all. 

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